Happiness is a warm puppy...or gerbil...or newt.

by Tina Coleman

Aside from their rambunctious loyalty, house pets can relieve stress, provide companionship, and make us feel loved.

When Buster, a one-year-old Shetland sheepdog, joined our family, each of us held different hopes and expectations for what this new relationship would bring.

Our children wanted a playmate. My husband wanted someone to greet him excitedly at the front door. I wanted a companion who would make daily exercise walks more palatable. I craved the companionship of a creature who would love me even when I said "no"—someone who wouldn't whine or talk back or leave wet towels on the bathroom floor.

Buster has not disappointed us. In fact, loving and caring for Buster has enriched our lives in ways none of us could have predicted.

Buster has become more than just a playmate to our children. He has become a sibling and confidante who listens to their problems without making judgments or interrupting. We laugh at his playful antics, and he provides lots of opportunity for physical exercise. He is helping us teach our children responsibility, and they are reaping the rewards of putting another creature's needs before their own.

Buster provides our family with a topic of conversation at a time when our teenagers would probably not talk to us otherwise. He has reminded me that taking time out to play is not only fun, but also boosts my creativity and my productivity.

It's been documented that petting an animal reduces blood pressure, a major factor in maintaining cardiovascular health. The value of pet therapy to patients in rehabilitation hospitals and nursing homes is widely recognized. For years, service animals have provided priceless assistance to those with disabilities. Fewer of us, though, realize the important role that companion animals play in the emotional health of their humans.

"Pets are part of the family and, as with any family member, they have a lot to do with how people adjust, adapt, and deal with changes and loss. They provide a sense of security and continuity. They can help teach love and acceptance, and they can aid in confidence-building," says Dr. Alan D. Entin, a family therapist in Richmond, Virginia.

Pet owners tend to have healthier relationships with other people, notes Maureen Fredrickson, vice president of programs for the Delta Society, an organization that promotes animals helping people improve their health, independence and quality of life. "Pet ownership may create a more complete, aware person who's more willing to venture outside of himself." Pets, she says, interrupt the internal dialogue that can undermine our confidence and self-esteem.

"Any kind of companion animal plays a social role in the lives of people and families," agrees Michael Kaufmann, director of education for the American Humane Association. "Animals support and strengthen people's lives." Here's how:

Seniors

• Seniors who have pets are less likely to go to the doctor and worry about their health and finances. They suffer less from loneliness and despair, have more external contacts and a stronger sense of the future, and exhibit less stress, says Fredrickson.

Young children

• Younger children often view pets as siblings and friends. In fact, children with chronic illness and those in other stressful circumstances often say that their pet was their only friend. Children who are emotionally attached to animals, says Fredrickson, have more empathy and perhaps even better reading skills, because they often practice reading to their pets.

Teenagers

• Many teens, Kaufmann says, continue their close relationships with the family pet even as they struggle to become independent from their families. "Animals can be very supportive during those years," he says.

Young adults

• "We continue to find that for young single people who work long hours in stressful environments, pets provide a sense of family and a focus in their lives other than the work environment," Kaufmann notes. "The care and feeding of a pet are what make the relationship special, and force people to schedule their lives in a different way."

People of all ages

• Pets motivate people to be physically and socially active. Walking a dog, for instance, gets people out of their homes. Once outside, pets provide a "social glue" between their owners and other pet owners and neighbors. Pets are conversation starters. People who are not usually outgoing in social situations are usually enthusiastic about discussing their pets.

Pet ownership isn't a cure-all. In fact, says Entin, some people use pets as barriers to developing or advancing human relationships. He doesn't recommend a companion animal for someone who should be working on developing other kinds of relationships. "Companion animals are not a substitute for human companionship," he says.

Pets won't teach your children responsibility. Teaching responsibility is a parent's not a pet's role, so it's important for kids to be supervised when taking care of their pets. Entin suggests spelling out everyone's roles in caring for the pet ahead of time, to avoid tensions that can arise when family members argue about responsibilities.

Don't underestimate the care that pets need. "People think gerbils are easy. Well, compared to a horse, that's true. But gerbils still need to eat every day, they need clean bedding, and fresh water, etc. Animals are no less responsibility than humans. It's just a different kind of responsibility," says Frederickson.

Life changes can be stressful. Moving to a new home where pets are not allowed can be traumatic for pet owners and their pets. Seniors who move into a health care setting where animals are not welcome often suffer health setbacks. Often, pets aren't allowed into battered women's shelters. Pet owners who become too ill to care for their animals face difficult, often heartbreaking decisions.

When not to get a pet. If you're having marital difficulties, don't get an animal. It will just end up as part of the divorce settlement, warns Fredrickson. If you are going through a major life change, don't get a pet. Wait until things calm down to begin another "relationship." "Don't get a pet to fix your life. It can't," she says. "Get a pet after you've made your life changes; a pet can be a partner in that."

A pet's death can be traumatic. Companion animals force us to confront our own mortality. The loss of a pet is often a child's first experience with death. If this experience is supported carefully by caregivers, Kaufmann says, the death of a pet can be a wonderful, albeit difficult, lesson. Developing rituals such as a ceremony or brief service is an important part of the grief process.

For people at any age, the death of a pet is often more difficult because they feel guilty or silly mourning their companion. People mourn and grieve for animals the same way they do for people and need to be supported in their grief. "A lot of people are taken by surprise by the depth of their grief at losing a pet. Don't be afraid to get some counseling or help. Talk to people about it," says Kauffman.

Thanks to him, we've met more of our neighbors (and their pets). We've become familiar with the flora and fauna that grow within a mile radius of our home. We've learned to appreciate the beauty of the nighttime sky. And because Buster enjoys walking at a leisurely pace, I haven't yet reached my slim-down goal. But he loves me anyway cellulite and all so that's okay.

"If we could bottle and sell what animals do for us, we could reduce health care costs immeasurably," says Fredrickson. I'll buy that.